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My heart has never beaten so strong after seeing an area code on a phone call....

When I finally checked my voicemail and called the number back I found out that....

I GOT INTO WHEELOCK COLLEGE FOR GRADUATE SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I cannot believe it. I am still shaking. But what I do know is that the area code that gave me a heart attack this morning will be where I am living come August.

AHHHHHHHHH

WOW!

I can see the light

I think I may be able to see the light at the end of the last-first semester. Less than two weeks until I have my final, final of the semester and I am cool, calm, and collected one minute and positive I am in over my head the next minute.

I know, I know….I’ve done this 6 times before, I know how to do it, I can do it…. Yeah I know, but let me have a minor stress period, okay?

I only have one in class final. One take home. A 6 week interdisciplinary unit to create. A presentation. A big paper. A small paper. AND then I am one semester away from finishing my second to last semester as an undergraduate.

I can do it. I know I can. The biggest thing to get done is this presentation and big paper that go with it. Then I think I am in good shape. The amount of time I have spent on trains in the last week has helped a lot. I used my time off at home (is it wrong I have NO idea how to relax on vacation) this past week to work on the small paper and 6 week unit.

So, I know I am in good shape. It’s just getting it done, handing it in, and not freaking out at the thought that in two weeks I will be 5 months from graduating college.

This is the final lap and I am taking deep breathes……

This may have ruined my childhood....

If I wasn't a vegetarian already, I sure would be now!!

I wonder if the side dishes that go with this meal are Lamb Chop and Snuffleupagus Spare Ribs....

Hope your Thanksgiving is better than Big Birds....

Gobble

Happy Turkey-less day!

I truly love Thanksgiving. The chill in the air, the time off from school, time with family, the parade on TV, and delicious food!

We are going over to friends this year, we were over last night baking the pie and the sweet potato fluff.

There is something about today. Finding things to be thankful for, even in the midst of tough times. This year hasn't been easy on my family. But last weekend seemed to kick-off what is hopefully going to be a year of opportunities and simchas.

I also have thought long and hard about what I can be thankful for in this past year, and I thought I would share some with you -so here goes:

- I am thankful that I had 21 years with my Bubbe and Zayda

- I am thankful that mom and I got a vacation to Boston this year

- I am thankful that in the last year I was able to see Avi and Ben 5 times. Even in sad times it was a blessing to see them since they live so far away.

- I am thankful for the opportunities I have had for internships in the last year which have helped point me towards special education.

- I am thankful for my health and my families health, so far swine free.

- I am thankful that my parents still have jobs in these tough times and can provide me with my education

There are many more - but that is it for now!

Enjoy your day, be thankful for what you have and hug your family!

Tamar

Is there good whiplash?

I have whiplash.... good whiplash.... from this whirlwind day..... it is still sinking in.....

I went to Boston today, and hopefully hit a home run. Either way I know I brought it all to the table.

Seriously, my mind is spinning. Did I really do a 12 hour and 15 minute trip today? Did I really go to Boston, interview for graduate school, and then come home? All in one day? Wow.

It felt so good to wander the streets, albeit cold streets of Boston. I loved going back to Quincy market, walking along the Commons, it just felt so right.

So we shall see. I am off to bed, 12 hour travel whiplash makes you tired! Well, that and a bunch of adrenaline draining out of my body.

And now we wait!

Boston, ho!

Well, tomorrow at 9 am I am heading north! Final destination? Boston!

I have a 2:15 interview with a professor on the graduate admissions board. It is becoming more and more real by the minute.....

My dress is ironed....

My bag is packed.....

12 1/2 hours of travel to and from Boston, and it is so worth it!

I am so excited to be back in Brookline, strolling Beacon street. Riding the "T" with my Charlie Card in hand. And breathing in the crisp November air of Bean Town.

I have what to keep me busy with during the 7 hours worth of train time: 2 books, 3 magazines, some AU course work, and lots of songs from Glee to listen to.

I am so excited for this one minute and freaking out the next.

One foot in front of the other.... onto the train and onto Boston!

Reaping in Joy

Well, it's about time this family had a simcha!

Psalm 126 says "Those who sow in tears will reap in joy."

And today and last night that is what our family did. We celebrated my youngest cousin Yona's bar mitzvah. And he did a wonderful job.

We were greeted by many family friends who said "so nice to see you on happy occasions" and yes it was.

The simple joy of coming together as a family and friends to celebrate, not mourn. It felt SO good. We all kept saying that. It just felt great to see people and laugh with them, and celebrate with them, and watch Yona enter Jewish manhood.

There was also much discussion about Bubbe and Zayda, how proud they would have been of Yona, how they were looking down and so proud of how he did and who he has become. We missed them terribly, but I know they wouldn't have wanted us to focus on missing them but celebrate the wonderful person Yona has become.

I have watched Yona grow since I was 9 years old. He is now taller than I am! He is a great young man, funny, serious, loving, and overall a great cousin. Oh and a Glee fan!

As we parted ways today we said "may we only see each other on Simchas." May this be true!!

Sorry Yona, these are the most recent pictures of you I have (-:

Ehhhh, Looks Like a Hurricane Came Through Here

Well, it's more like remnants of a hurricane blowing through here, but Hurricane Ida is the cause of that big green blob over most of the east coast today.

Hurricane Ida - sorta weird since that is my mom's name. I looked up past names and noticed that there has been a hurricane Arthur (after Zayda), a hurricane Isidor (a great grandfather), and I think I recall a hurricane Rachel (Bubbe) at some point.

So it looks like the National Hurricane Service has a think against the Benjamin side of the family.... But I have realized one thing.....

Unless the Israeli's take over the National Hurricane Service there is never a chance in life that Avi and I will have hurricanes named after us!

Full Circle

I had a "coming full circle" moment today. Okay, well I have been having lots of "oh look how far I've come" moments but todays was different.

I was asked to sit on a student panel with 4 other students today and answer questions to a group of NJ high schoolers who were on a DC college tour with their synagogue. We talked about AU Jewish life, AU life, preparing to apply life, and answers their questions.

Then I realized why I was seeing so many tours on campus today and yesterday, and why Hillel was talking to two NJ groups - the NJEA convention. This is an annual teachers convention for NJ teachers. NJ students look forward to a 4 day weekend, teachers look forward to the convention, and for high schoolers its the perfect time to look at colleges.

Standing in the middle of the quad this afternoon, realizing that the NJEA convention is going on right now made me realize that 4 years ago mom and I were standing somewhere on the quad, in an AU tour, with tons of other NJ high schoolers.

More importantly is that four years ago standing on the Quad on the chilly grey November day I fell in love with AU. I decided that AU is where I had to go for college. And today I was able to share with a room for of high schoolers my love of AU and the excitement and sadness I have of leaving after graduation. And then....

Wheelock called to let me know that the last reference needed for my application had arrived. Between the excitement and anxiousness that phone call brought I had a realization - here I am exactly 4 years later, once again in love with another college. I'm getting ready to take the next step in my life.

Somehow, in 4 years I have come full circle, putting one foot in front of the other!

Hey Zayda, Want to Have a World Series?

Remember this post?

Well, it's 10:30 pm - Game 6 of the world series and the Yankees are up 7-3 in the 6th inning. If things go as they are, I think my Zayda is going to get his series.

My mom and I were talking a few nights ago, when the Yankees won and were leading 3-1, and we were remembering the summer of 2008 when we tried really hard to bring Zayda to Yankees Stadium, deep down knowing it was probably our last chance to try. Well, that summer was tumultuous health wise for Bubbe and it just didn't happen.

That was the last season at that stadium, and by the time the first pitch of the season was thrown out in the 2009 season Zayda was too weak to try to bring to a game.

Except if you believe in angels.... and I do.....

I also believe that Zayda is out there right now, either on the field or in the stands cheering his Bronx Bombers on....

I believe he "let" the Phillies win Monday night so he could see the Yankees win at home....

And I believe that he has been pulling strings since July 2oth so that he could see the Yanks win a series after a bit of a drought... (I will admit, even as a Red Sox fan they have been playing like champs.....)

But, just this year Zayda! My Red Sox are going to be back in the running next year but I am so happy that the Yankees won this for you, you deserve it for being a loyal fan, still loving your Red Sox fan grand-daughter, and just being you.

I love and miss you more than ever tonight - enjoy the sights from the new stadium, I hear it is a beautiful one and I am sorry we never were able to take you to another game, but I know you got there in spirit.

The Feeling in the Air

I love the holiday time! And since it's November 1st and I saw this Christmas tree being put up this past week and Chanukah decorations being sold in the store - I am pretty sure it is the holiday time!

I get really happy around this time of the year. I love when it gets dark early (I know I am the only person in the world), I love the chill in the air and wearing sweaters and scarves, and I get really excited when Starbucks brings out its holiday cup. Mind you, I do not like their coffee all that much, I like the pretty red cup - kudos to their marketing people for that one!

I also love holiday lights (tasteful ones, that is) and the feeling in the air. You know what I mean, everyone is happier. Clerks wish you a happy holidays, there is a feeling of joy and hope in the air. People spend time with family and slow down the business of their lives a little bit. It is just a great time of the year, in my opinion.

I think I really like this time of year, aside from my reasons above, because of my tendencies to be an empath. I really can feel other peoples emotions, rather happy, sad, or ho-hum. This time of year when people tend to be cheerier I feed off these vibes and I am super happy. Besides being happy that the Halloween season is over, I was thrilled it was November 1st because I know people will be happier as we move closer to Thanksgiving and the December festivities.

Only 26 days until Thanksgiving! Get excited!!