kid 1: my brain can't handle this
kid 2: it can't handle the truth?
me: can you say easy way out?
kid 1: easy way out...
kid 2: not what she meant
kid: I shall....persevere...maybe!
kid: i tried 100 times
me: try 101
kid: ugh fine one more try
kid: i want a tutu and a jetpack
me: those aren't natural colors
kid: they are to natural colors!
me: lakes aren't orange
kid: is mini-sota tiny?
kid: do they text in texas?
me: we do this to help you learn
kid: nah...it doesn't help
me: when you have two education degrees we can talk
kid: wait, what's our country
me: i pledge allegience to the flag of the...
kid: wellll we're actually not that united these days
kid 1: there is no one to blame
kid 2: you can blame me?
kid 1: eh no thanks
boy: you clean it up
girl: i am not your maid!
kid 1: did you cut your hair
kid 2: seriously, you think she cuts her own hair
kid 1: good point do we trust her with scissors
me: thanks guys....
me: guys, tattling is so second grade
kid: eh it's more like so kindergarten
me: eyes on me please
kid: it's going to be really messy if we all put our eyes ON you!
me: did you just 'yes ma'am' me
kid: you know it
kid: no no i'm the only dealer
me: oh really now
kid: yep, the best dealer in all of third grade
me: ummmmmmm
kid: can I write "i said sorry you don't have a horse...apologetically"
me: that works
kid 1: whose going to read this article
me: it'll be in the weekly school update email
kid 2: we're going to be school famous!
me: ID is which state....
kid: i forgot
me: idaho
kid: knew it was something hoe
me: it's a little noisy
kid: i know because we're talking!
kid: idamoose
kid: i had a phonics dream over break it was wordy
me: do you see how funny that statement is?
kid: it wasn't funny it was a nightmare the books were eating me!
me: what does groan mean
kid: what I do allll day.....are we done now?
kid 1: how did you think so fast
ms. gerber: because i'm smart
kid 2: that's a really logical explanation!
kid 1: doe a deer a female dear
moose obsessed kid: moo a moose a female moose
kid 3: COW
ms. gerber: thanks for the ego boost!
kid: hey that's a phonics word!
me: america is a nation of immigrants
kid: they get the job done!
kid: it's spring why is there snow
me: oh come on you know it doesn't just go poof on the first day of spring
kid: a girl can dream
ms. gerber: thanks for the ego boost!
kid: hey that's a phonics word!
me: america is a nation of immigrants
kid: they get the job done!
kid: it's spring why is there snow
me: oh come on you know it doesn't just go poof on the first day of spring
kid: a girl can dream
me: oops I skewed the data
kid: you screwed!?!?!!
me: NO!
kid: what did you screw!?
me: stop. Please. Stop!!
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Oh my word, these cracked me up!! (I have to say that my tween still comes up with similar smartypants comments... When will they ever tire of puns?!)
ReplyDelete...Ah, the age of alternate facts!
ReplyDeleteI love these. Wish I did this when I was teaching!!!
ReplyDeleteAww, these are sweet :) Kids say the best things. Thanks for hosting Tamar :)
ReplyDeleteThey do say the funniest things!!! :)
ReplyDeleteIt wouldn't be complete without a Hamilton reference! These are all so great!
ReplyDeleteSomehow wanting a tutu and and a jetpack just makes so much sense at that age. Hee hee! these are endlessly entertaining.
ReplyDeleteLOL. Kids are so literal at that age! I love the moose obsessed kid!
ReplyDeleteLOL! Children say the darnedest things! I don't know how you can keep a straight face when they do ;)
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh some of those were just so funny. I'm so glad you remember them and share. Thanks for the laughs.
ReplyDeleteKids are so funny. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDelete