Things My Third Graders Say v. 20

kid 1: you didn't do that

kid 2: i did too

me: don't fact check each other please

kid 3: no fake news! 

me: your hands felt clammy what does that mean?

kid: you're handling raw clams

me: (reading) he called her a chick

kid 1: what's a chick

kid 2: a hot woman!

kid: you circled that but i had it right

me: i know i wanted to make sure you were paying attention

kid: i'm hungry...i'm angry...i'm hangry!

kid 1: number one dares go first, then double dares

me: that's how it works?

kid 2: yes it's highly logical

kid 1: my mom was pregnant 3 times and had five kids...

kid 2: that math is wrong

kid 1: i know my dad almost ran away!

kid: your real name is tamar...you're teaching name is ms. benjamin

kid: i'm offended by everyone saying they are offended

me: how'd you know that

kid: i asked my Alexa

me: what's a wart

kid 1: a really nasty pimple

kid 2: but one that can get frozen off

me: ok you just said what i said in an israeli accent....not helpful

kid: yeah it is he understands israeli...not plain hebrew

kid 1: JK Rowling's house is on 160 acres

kid 2: she must have have a ton of books!

kid 3: won't the anchors make them wet?

me: if you amaze me i am in a state of...

kid: massachusetts? 

kid 1: (singing) john jacobs jinglehymer schmitt

kid 2: i'm not allowed to sing that song...too easy to say a bad word

me: what a great way to start the week

kid: it's monday that's the only way to start the week

kid: what is that

me: the music? it's bach

kid: sounds like dying cats

kid 1: and then at color war...

me: it's far too early to talk about color war

kid 2: or far too late

me: i cant help you when you whine at me

kid 1: i'm not whining

kid 2: she's 8 not 21. she can't wine and dine

morah dani: hurry you're late!

kid: please. nothing at maimo starts without me

video: fact or opinion...coffee is delicious

kid 1: ewww good thing i'm not a grown up because i think coffee is nasty

kid 2: you're not a grown up...yet!
kid 1: well that part is a fact!

kid: i don't know how we got from american girl dolls to politics

kid 1: it's not a fact...it snows in winter

me: february is in winter

kid 2: winter is coming!

me: is it a fact or an opinion that all teachers are adults

kid: fact...if kids taught we'd all be dumb

kid 1: i do not like dogs...i only like puppies, they aren't dogs yet

kid 2: that's like saying a baby isn't a person!

me: excuse me...are you the teacher?
kid: yup
me: oh really? Where did you get your education degree?
kid: the "university of kids can teach and stuff"
me: wow! Is that accredited?
kid: no we only cover the exciting stuff. That sounds boring.

me: please "shark" your chromebook...like this {snaps on my finger}

kid: that shark just bit you!

me: what are the cardinal directions?

kid 1: the positions on the cardinals baseball team?

me: not quite

kid 2: the direction the little red bird goes?

kid (singing): he's killing me softly with his song

kid 2: maybe it was a bad song...that will kill someone!

me: what does husbandry mean?

kid: adultary for men?

   

    An InLinkz Link-up
   

Come link up and join...

the Good.Random.Fun. each Monday and Little Things Thursday...right here!